The 4 Big Lies We Tell Parents

The 4 Big Lies We Tell Parents

 - Sleep training - 16:20

- Repression is a great defense in the last years of life time before you're basically forget & get amnesia - 20:00

- Fathers regulate excitement, aggression & impulsivity - 25:30

- In America, parents are spending about 90 minutes a day with their children - 33:35

- Don't be rigid about when they go to sleep (giving them time) - 37:55

- Disconnection of mom with their kids - 45:00

- Attachment disorder - 45:15

- Passed down generationally not genetically.

- Mother who struggled with attachment, deeply connecting, dependency (Past history).

- Passed down to generation with pathological defenses.

- Coping mechanisms:

1. Avoidant attachment disorder leads to depression & loneliness.

2. Ambivalent attachment disorder (Clingy to mom). 

3. Disorganized attachment disorder (Baby without a strategy). 

- Avoidant & Ambivalent attachment disorder are strategies - 46:50

- Coping mechanism is not getting their emotional needs met. Doesn't have a strategy.

- Disorganized attachment baby will cycle through all the strategies.

- First they'll turn away from their mother.

- Then they'll cling to the mother.

- Then they'll slap the mother out of rage.

- & then they'll circle through - 47:15

- Feeling safe, secured, loved & understood (4 basics) - 50:35

- Treatment from psychoanalytic psychotherapist - 51:40